How coaching differs from other counselling

What makes coaching stand out 

Unlike many other professionals, who are product or subject matter experts, the coach is a process expert. This means they do not operate from the outlook of an expert who is “superior” to the other person. Even if they have the answers, they do not readily offer them because they believe that everybody’s situation or circumstances are different. To them, no one size fits all. Another reason is that they believe that each time they offer any ready solution, they are actually disempowering the person instead of empowering them! Instead, they use a powerful process to empower people to make their own self-discovery. 

So while others address the ‘head’ aspect of the person where logic and intellect reside and where telling, advising and prescribing are the common methods, the coach deploys powerful deep listening and powerful questioning methods to discern the underlying issues and roadblocks that lie deep at the ‘heart level’ of the person. 

Doing this not only helps in getting to the bottom of their issues but also helps them to find answers that can solve their own issues or reach their goals. 

 

What makes coaching a special relationship 

A coach works hard to win the trust and intimacy of the person. Truly, this is the cornerstone of coaching because without it the truth is never told. When this is missing, it is almost impossible to coach effectively; like a “dog barking at the cat on the wrong tree!” Successful coaching hugely depends on the ability of the coach to win the hearts of the coachee.

When this exists, people are comfortable and open up readily because there is a safe environment where respect and sincerity prevail that leads them to express freely without the fear of criticism, ridicule, judgement and backlash, etc. 

Indeed, a coach works hard to win their hearts, for they know that unless the truth is out, coaching is meaningless and a sheer waste of time! 

 

Is it true that counselling also deploys listening and questioning?

Yes, listening and questioning are used in counselling too. However, they differ in perhaps two areas. Firstly, questioning and listening are predominantly confined to help them gain higher self-awareness more than getting them to work out their game plans on specific action. Secondly, the counsellor is usually the expert, which means a fair amount of advice is given to the client. 

On the other hand, coaching strives to be an equal partnership where the coach believes that the coachee has the answers and it is their work to help them find out, not only on what is affecting them but also specific ways of overcoming them. Thirdly, a coach not only tracks and monitors the coachee’s performance over a period of time, but also instils ownership and holds them accountable to their goal. 

 

Does it mean that training and mentoring are out of date?

No! Both are relevant and useful depending on when they are used. Primarily, when a person lacks technical knowledge or is in the early stage of mental and intellectual development, training and mentoring are in fact more important than coaching. However, when the person has acquired a certain level of competency, a trainer and mentor must know that their telling and advising must either end or tone down for some measures of coaching to be built into their development plan. In other words, they need to know that the time for “giving the fish” must be replaced with “teaching them how to fish” now. This is necessary as at the end of the day, it is about building independence and self-sustainability in the person to live their lives. 

 

Can coaching be used for all situations? 

Coaching serves best when the person is of a stable mind and emotional state. 

In extreme circumstances, where medical attention is necessary – for instance in cases involving drug addiction, suicidal tendencies, acute depression and other forms of mental dysfunction – coaching is of little help. These situations need therapy and other forms of professional medical intervention where knowledge of medicine and mental disorder management is paramount and an expert is needed, as the patient is in no position to think and behave rationally. 

 

How much did you learn from here? 

1 “A coach is a process expert and not a product expert.” What does this mean?

2 What is deep listening and powerful questioning used for? 

3 Explain this statement: If counselling also uses listening and questioning, how then is coaching different from them? 

4 Which types of cases are not suitable for coaching? 

5 What other insights have you gained from this lesson? 

 

Corporate Coach Academy is a coaching school in Asia to certify leaders of all backgrounds to become manager-coaches or professional certified coaches in this region. Log in to www.corporate-coachacademy.com or email [email protected] for details.