
They’re at it again! Welcome, everybody, to the Eric Bahrt versus Tom Turk Food Fight, Round 94!
I would like to warn these two obviously stressed gentlemen of the dangers that their obsession is inflicting on their health. Permanent stress caused by arguing over egg yolks and cabbage leaves leads to suppression of the immune system, which can bring about a range of ailments such as Crohn’s disease, psoriasis and arthritis, and reduced resistance to viral attack. Stress also causes cardiovascular disease, which leads to heart attacks and death, and even worse, reduced sexual desire.
My well-meaning nutritional advice to Eric and Tom for a long and happy life is as follows:
1. Go to your nearest fresh food market.
2. Buy meat, eggs, vegetables and fruit.
3. Go home.
4. Eat it.
Nigel Pike