Phew! This article can now be read

WEDNESDAY, DECEMBER 26, 2012
Phew! This article can now be read

I drafted this article on what many thought might be the world's last day. Never one to believe in doomsday predictions, I'm paranoid from time to time, though. Which means that while I was 99.99 per cent sure that nothing would happen to our planet ove

Now that we have survived, I can share it with you. Just to be trendy, let’s not call the following list “My wishes for the New Year”, which sounds a bit cliched anyway. Let’s call it “My wishes for the year that the Mayan prophecy advocates thought would never come”. Okay, here’s what I want to have, or see, or hear in 2013:

1. A formal media interview by Prime Minister Yingluck Shinawatra. Come on, lady. About halfway into your second year, we have yet to see a press article with your mugshot and the word “Exclusive”. If you still can’t overcome stage fright, a closed-door format can be worked out. Every leading politician gives a serious interview at least once or twice, and you can’t insist on being the exception.
2. An end to the continuous bedazzlement of the international media by globe-trotting Thaksin Shinawatra. If you keep talking, your sister won’t speak. And she’s my prime minister, for crying out loud.
3. Thais’ love for their Constitution. I don’t mean “Only when it suits me” love, but unconditional treatment of a Constitution as truly our common values, that all Thais will stand for and sacrifice themselves to protect.
4. No more 3G, 4G or 5G legal brouhaha. They say the trouble and delay has to do with issues facing consumers like me. I’m done with the lip service. Just get going and let me and other consumers handle the greedy operators. Trust me, Facebook is more effective than slowing it down at the Administrative Court.
5. Uninterrupted cellular calls. People are talking about better mobile phone “packages” and all, but I want basic services to be consistent first. I want to place one call for one conversation and that’s it, not three or four calls for telling a colleague why I miss a meeting. And now that I’m at it, I want to hear human voices when I contact the call centres of banks, telecom firms, etc to make complaints. How can they use real humans to chase unpaid bills but make us listen to mechanical voices and silly promotional music when the tables are turned?
6. Continuation of Apple’s copyright policy. Samsung must have been celebrating throughout 2012. That Apple kept picking on their products inadvertently made them producers of credible alternatives to iPhones and iPads. What could have been a better advertisement for Samsung, which was a second- or even third-class company a few years ago? But my point, really, is that Apple’s refusal to remain aloof is doing everyone the world of good. The whole industry and consumers are benefiting, not just Samsung.
7. An institutionalised concept of working from home, perhaps with great tax incentives. On the streets next year there will be cars, cars, cars, cars, cars, cars, cars, cars, cars and cars. And many of the drivers will be newbies.
8. A Thai soap opera hit that, for a change, doesn’t feature a “bad girl” as the heroine. I mean, can’t good girls be heroines anymore?
9. “Myanmar” from Barack Obama’s lips. What I mean is an unequivocal utterance, not diplomacy-induced mumbles like when he visited that country recently. In fact, Washington’s diplomacy and political stand are confusing the living daylights out of me. I don’t want to write a news story that begins with “US President Barack Obama yesterday visited a country he finally called ‘Myanmar’, but that was out of diplomatic courtesy as Washington’s formal stand regarding the country’s name remains ‘Burma’”. 
10. Settlement of the “Rai Som” controversy. One way or another, it must end. Everyone – TV Channel 3, Sorrayuth Suthassanachinda, his critics and his supporters – can’t keep going like this. It’s bad for everybody’s business, mental health and conscience. I’m begging the judges to please, please, please hurry up.
11. Another “Gangnam”-style (no pun intended) hit featuring an older, fatter man. Psy has boosted the confidence and self-esteem of 30-something guys who don’t have a six pack. It’s time to step up on the age and weight departments.
12. Civilised manners by both Thailand and Cambodia. This is very important. With an international court verdict on Preah Vihear looming, we are going to need both governments to be anything but thugish this year.
That’s it, my list of New Year wishes that had been under threat a few days ago. Merry Christmas to all of you and Happy New Year, albeit a year that Mayan prophecy advocates have had a very different idea about.