Doctors’ strict parenting advice on Facebook causes a ruckus
Every decent parent wants to raise their children to be the best they can be, but parenting differs in each family. The raising of children traditionally is believed to be a private affair – as long as people don’t tell other families how to behave.
Which explains why the Facebook page “Dad, Mom and Kids” has received a mixed reaction, with criticism for what some social media users call “extremely outdated” approaches to bringing up children.
The page is administrated by family physician Ittirit Chulalaksiriboon and his wife Sarinee, who is a child psychiatrist. Since May 2015, the two doctors have filled the page with how-to articles, attracting more than 100,000 “likes”.
But whether the general public would appreciate the page, which describes its content as “good stories and accurate information for everyone in families”, and also promotes a book written by Ittirit on how to get into medical school, is another story.
Children’s gaming behavior, early education and dating issues are among highly discussed topics on the page, at least among those comments that are not blocked or threatened with action under the Computer Crime Act.
“You have to completely stop children from playing around with electronic games. Children will only become addicted to them,” Ittirit wrote in one article. “Impulse control, brain development, stress relief are all fake excuses to let children play games. No doctor has ever endorsed those claims.”
The doctor went on that parents should erase all games from electronic gadgets and computers and exercise parental authority to take control of their kids.
“I have to write this because I was lucky that my father didn’t allow me to play games,” he added. “If he did so, I wouldn’t have been able to get into medical school.”
His article seemed to be persuasive as it raised concerns among respondents. One person asked the doctor: “I have a three-month-old baby. My husband just bought a PlayStation 4. He said that it’s better for the kid to play with his dad than go to a gaming centre. I’m really worried about my child’s future. What should I do?”
Ittirit replied: “You have to stop having kids with him, protect your child and start thinking about your financial future in case that your protection might cause [you two] to separate.”
On another occasion, an article entitled “Parents should delay when your children start dating as much as possible: by Doctor Ittirit” suggested:
“To secondary school students, while you find a private place to be together or to watch movies, many other students seriously study their lessons. How will you be able to compete with them? If your dreams are big, such as going to medical school, please allow me to ‘challenge’ you [and say] people like you are not competitive. You shouldn’t even register for admission exams.”
His wife Sarinee, a child psychiatrist, also wrote in the article “Don’t be afraid that your children will study too hard” that she was “very shocked” that modern parents didn’t have faith in the Thai education system.
“I don’t want any Thai person to have such an idea,” she said. “Thailand is a country with a long history. We have produced tonnes of world-renowned human resources. I don’t work for the Education Ministry but I only see very capable people in the education arena.”
The page has undoubtedly drawn mixed reactions and controversy, leading the two doctors on Tuesday to cease updating the page for a month to accept responsibility.
They also apologised to the page’s followers, including those whom they blocked or deleted comments, saying they wouldn’t write about gaming again.
Wimonrat Wanpen, a psychiatrist and deputy director of the Child and Adolescent Mental Health Rajanagarindra Institute, said there was no absolute right or wrong when it came to bringing up children.
“Even standardised psychiatric guidelines sometimes can be adjusted. It all depends on context,” Wimonrat told The Nation. “For instance, there is a standard that children younger than two should not play games. Still, I wouldn’t say that parents who want to leave their children with games and take some rest are doing wrong.”
Looking after children is an art of using discretion, she said.
When it comes to communicating with society as a doctor, she said it was important to distinguish between facts and opinions.
“Being a doctor can give credibility to your words. You can comment but you also have to be considerate,” she said. “I believe these kinds of pages are well-intended, but they have to pay attention to feedback for the most efficient communication.”
