You can't make this stuff up

As we gently tuck 2013 to bed (and hope we never see its like again), we ask it to name its 10 favourite Soopsip celebrity moments. Among the weddings and break-ups, the reunions and scandals, the extracurricular activities – from dancing for a banished prime minister to screaming for the removal of the latest one – there were many wonderful episodes and almost as many that just left us wondering. 

 

Janie’s got a guy

The Couple of the Year, we’ve decided, comprises actress Janie Thienphosuvarn and Chonsawat “Ae” Asavahame of the partially notorious Samut Prakan political clan. 

When rumours started going around in August that they were dating, people assumed that Janie had simply become the latest beautiful woman on the arm of Ae. He was something of a ladies man despite being married – or so we thought – to singer Nantida Kaewbuasai and being the father of their teenage daughter Pleng.

Then, all of a sudden, Ae urgently called a press conference at his residence to flourish a certificate proving that he and Janie were now man and wife. It was one of those speed-of-light weddings. As for Nantida, Ae said they’d never actually married legally and had in fact lived separately for many years. 

 

Less monkish Mitsuo

Phra Mitsuo Gavesako, the 61-year-old Japanese senior monk in Kanchanaburi who was fairly well known for disseminating Thai-language Buddhist scripture books, became even better known in June when he shed the saffron robes to take a bride.

Reclaiming his civilian name, Mitsuo Shibahashi declared that he’d “gone secular” after 38 years of serving the dharma to marry businesswoman Suttirat “Ann” Muittamara. It took considerable effort to begin convincing shocked followers that Ann – until then one of his helpful devotees at the monastery – hadn’t lured him away with evil intent.

The couple appeared on TV so that Shibahashi could insist he’d made the decision on his own, inspired by his first-ever glimpse of love. But he pledged to continue spreading the Buddhist word and just happened to have two new books about it already on the shelves.

 

The Baitoey boogie

Sutheewan “Baitoey” Thaveesin stole the spotlight this year in the raucous world of luk thung music, and not just because her popularity kept rising as her outfit kept shrinking. 

Eyebrows shot up higher than her hemline in September when Baitoey inadvertently leaked the news that she’d recently entertained Thaksin Shinawatra, the benighted and exiled vote-magnet, at parties for him in Hong Kong and Singapore. Her record label, RS, had provided the singers, Baitoey said, and she received Bt1 million for her efforts. 

RS chief Surachai “Hia Hor” Chetchotisak was evidently not too pleased that everyone now knew his firm was entertaining a wanted criminal, and within days Baitoey was bawling her eyes out at a press conference, apologising for the bean spillage. Then everything seemed cool again – until November, when a photo showing Thaksin shopping with a woman at an overseas mall went viral on the social media. The viral media decided it was Baitoey. Baitoey insisted it wasn’t. 

 

Tangmo tales

Actors Pattaratida “Tangmo” patcharaveerapong and Pakin “Tono” Khamwilaisuk are totally hung up on each other, but this creates a very unromantic hang-up for handsome Tono’s fans. They spent a considerable amount of time and energy online this year calling her a hussy, and Tangmo was just as devoted in her response, prompting the fans to say she’s rude too. 

Thaksin Shinawatra would doubtless agree after Tangmo got onstage at an anti-government rally last month and laid into him with words harsh enough to draw a defamation threat from Thaksin’s lawyer. The threat proved empty, so on the “auspicious” date of 11/12/13, Tangmo and Tono went ahead and got engaged – only to earn more criticism because the ceremony was so “private”, with a mere 20 guests who were given no advanced notice. 

A TV Pool reporter identified as Tao, who was among the critics, bore Tangmo’s wrath on the social media and, it must be said, put up a good defence. It was a lovely little scrap to end the year!

 

Fighting mood

Controversy is a frequent sparring partner for Thai cinema’s top action star, Thatchakorn “Tony Jaa” Yeerum, and they went another few rounds this year. The country was agog while Jaa and his wife bickered publicly with members of their own families, but that was just the warm-up for the main event. Just as Jaa’s new movie “Tom-Yum-Goong 2” was set to be released in Thai cinemas, the star jetted off to Hollywood to appar in “Fast and Furious 7”. 

International success deserves cheers, but Somsak “Sia Jiang” Techaratanaprasert, head of Jaa’s studio, Sahamongkol Film, pointed out that he ought to have asked permission first. There were two more of those “urgent press conferences” in which the studio fired warning shots across Jaa’s bows, but he sailed off anyway.

As things stand right now, he’s back in Bangkok, courting more projects with a breach-of-contract lawsuit hanging over his head. 

 

Hormonal issues

A nasty little scandal starring Sutatta “Panpan” Udomsilp, one of the young cast members of the television hit “Hormones the Series”, turned out pretty well actually. 

A photo “leaked” online in July showed her taking an illegal drug, but her father Surasak headed off disgrace by quickly calling a press conference to apologise for his daughter’s poor judgement. Chalerm Yoobamrung, who was Interior minister at the time, tried to help by lying, declaring from his parallel universe that the 16-year-old hadn’t taken any drugs at all.

Whatever, Panpan went low-profile and got some counselling, and within a few months she was able to announce that she’d be returning for the series’ second season. Meanwhile her dad was widely hailed as a caring and virtuous man.

 

Yui’s new wardrobe

Thai supermodel Rojjana “Yui” Phetkanha had already fallen far from the gleaming catwalks of Paris and Milan by the time she was found wandering the cruel Bangkok streets in a daze at mid-year and swept into a mental institute. 

One local paper was too quick to judge the 37-year-old as “homeless and insane”. It turned out that she suffers from bipolar disorder, probably brought on in part by the cocaine and other drugs she took that scuttled her modelling career in the first place. 

Yui fought back admirably, though, and by December was astride a Bangkok fashion runway and clearly past the crisis.

 

Wish upon a star

Until this year it was only the bravest of TV and film stars who would take the career risk of participating in political uprisings. But the “whistles of November” (and December) summoned the celebrities en masse. Many joined the marches and some got onstage to make speeches – and not without controversy. 

Actors, comedians, musicians, TV producers and hosts, filmmakers, models, magazine editors and makeup artists have been illuminating the rallies with their star power. And some of them – like Kijmanoch “Kru Lilly” Rojanasupya and Dr Sorawit “Kong” Suboon – seem to have found new callings as social activists and become brighter stars than ever.