The good, bad and ugly of 'bandido' nicknames
Readers may have heard about Joaquin Guzman Loera, nicknamed El Chapo. As the biggest drug kingpin in Mexico, he is a very nasty dude who has tortured and murdered a large number of people in extremely gruesome ways.
He recently escaped from a maximum-security prison through a tunnel big enough to accommodate a motorcycle. He made additional headlines recently by insulting Donald Trump, calling him a “lousy white faggot”, thus ensuring him the Republican presidential nomination.
Without wishing to suggest that this unsavoury fellow should be emulated in any manner, I confess to liking El Chapo’s nickname, which means “Shorty”. It has occurred to me that all of us could enrich our personal charisma by adopting a Mexican bandido nickname. Google “English-Spanish dictionary” and type in a salient personal characteristic to find one uniquely suited to your personality. A bandido nickname will greatly boost your status, enhance your style, and make you an irresistible chick-magnet.
To give you the idea, The Donald’s bandido nickname would obviously be El Donaldo. Jeb Bush would be El Jebbo, and Hillary would be La Hilaria. Prime Minister Prayut’s nickname could highlight his leadership (El Primero) or his temperament (El Furioso). Phra Suthep would be El Monje (meaning “The Monk”) and, among frequent contributors to the Letters column, I don’t need to tell you who El Vegetariano would be.
Forget about headache-inducing problems like the water shortage, the southern insurgency, the Greek economic crisis and the Iranian nuclear deal. Let’s all adopt bandido nicknames.
Ye Olde Pedant
(aka El Pedante Loco)
